Just Another Day…

Because I’m planning a 1,900 mile excursion at the end of the month, there a quite a few things I need to get done around the house, to ensure everything is safe and secure until my return. This included re-roofing my  storage building, the shingles of which had melted due to a horrific fire that destroyed a rice mill behind my home.  Later, high winds removed a few  shingles as well, and of course it had developed a few leaks, one of which had the downpour of a spigot.

So I get some “roll roofing” which of course is super easy to use.  I just need to rip off the old shingles, roll out the new stuff, and “viola”. Simple, right?

Of course, I can’t do anything without injuring myself, and this was done when I hit my knee cap full force with the claw end of the hammer when i missed the underside of the shingles I was going after.

After rolling around on the roof for a bit, clutching my knee and screaming like a crazed banshee from the pain, it’s time to “get ‘er done”.   Now then, you should take note of the area of the roof, just above the ladder, and where the roll of roofing material is laying. Apparently, the shingles where the only thing holding the particle board together underneath, and when i removed the shingles…

Yeah,  the roof collapsed, I fell through, and  landed inside the shed. I now know that an elevated plywood floor does have some “give” to it, somewhat cushioning the full body blow, and I had just barely missed landing on my cannon sized telescope.  After a bit more cussing, screaming, and all around really unladylike behavior, I got back after it, cutting out the roof and replacing the wood.

But, it got done, and once again, I survived. I was just driving in the last few nails when the rain began pouring down.  Yep…. Just another day in my life….

Another Ode to Coffee

Caffeine is my shepherd; I shall not doze.
It maketh me to wake in green pastures:
It leadeth me beyond the sleeping masses.
It restoreth my buzz:
It leadeth me in the paths of consciousness for its name’s sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of addiction,
I will fear no Equal™:
For thou art with me; thy cream and thy sugar they comfort me.
Thou preparest a carafe before me in the presence of The Starbucks:
Thou anointest my day with pep; my mug runneth over.
Surely richness and taste shall follow me all the days of my life:
And I will dwell in the House of Mochas forever.

~Author Unknown

Deer VS Truck

Got this from my friend in Malvern this morning.   The pictures pretty much tell the story, but here’s a brief explanation…

They were traveling in southern Arkansas, between Mena and DeQueen. Oncoming car clipped a deer and sent it straight up into the air. The deer came down head-first into Clayton’s brand new truck. The deer’s head went thru the front windshield, cutting the head (plus some) off, and landed in Jill’s lap. The body of the deer flipped up, smashed in the top of the truck, and landed in the bed. Clayton couldn’t see Jill from his side, because the top of the truck was smashed in so horribly. He got out of the truck, went around, and opened the door on her side…only to start flipping out, because she was literally drenched in blood. However, neither one of them was hurt. Her parents were following in a separate vehicle and didn’t see it happen…but drove up on it right afterward. I can’t imagine what they were thinking! I know this isn’t a unique experience, but I’ve never personally known anyone that it’s happened to or seen pictures. Crazy!

Changing Lanes on the Road Called “Life”

Did a traumatic experience transform your life for the better?

Have you suffered from the pain of an illness, divorce, loss of a job or loved one — but came out of the experience stronger, wiser, and more in touch with your purpose and passion in life?

Did you feel as though your life was at rock bottom but now you have risen from the ashes a much stronger person from that experience?

For me, it was prison. I live in a small rural town , and after having  my ex husband arrested for beating on me, I found myself uneducated, and unemployed   I turned to dealing meth to feed my child and pay my bills. It was extremely lucrative,  and for two years I “wanted for nothing”. I tried several times to quit dealing… to get a “real job”, but I couldn’t survive on the little income that gave me. Eventually, I was arrested, and served two years in prison. I lost my son, my home… everything. When I got out, I had NOTHING, even having to wear my prison clothes home, and to the bank to cash the $100 check they give you upon release. It changed my life. I remember laying in that cold, hard bunk thinking it would have been better to live with a blanket on a sandbar than to be there. I got out, took the first job I could get, applied to college, and set a different path.

It took me two years to get my son back, and I’m a senior in college now. I have a wall full of academic awards and news articles… among them… my arrest and conviction clippings.  I’ve talked to churches,  a criminology class, and to other groups about  where I had been, and how far I’ve come, and how people CAN change. I’m stronger, more confident, and have more faith than I ever thought imaginable.

My passion? Helping people be MORE than they (or others) think they can be.  People CAN change their lives. There IS a way out, and allow ANYONE to make them feel they are less than incredible.  They just have to believe, and sometimes that starts with someone else believing in THEM. I remind them that while no one ever said it would be easy, I can tell them, it is worth it.

Birthday Wishes

I miss him.

As my birthday approaches, he is the only gift my soul desires.

I miss the days when we played in the sun. I miss our time at the lake, and fishing with him, and that look on his face when I hooked the biggest bass of my life – so huge I freaked and tried to make him take the pole, but he just howled with laughter and made me do it on my own. I miss the countless hours we spent driving the winding back roads, taking in the scenic beauty, away from the world, talking and laughing. I miss the waterfalls, the hikes, and the woods. I still smile at the way he looked when I ran that crazy, rabid looking bat out of the little store, and I still cringe when I think about him hanging upside down from that tree over the side of the cliff.

I miss the evenings at his place when he would read to me from his Grandfather’s journal. I miss dinner with his family, and those fabulous meals his mom would make while his dad worked on homemade candy for later. I miss throwing darts with him, and listening to his stories. I loved watching him – the intense, animated way he would tell them- making me feel like I was there when it happened… a part of the story.

I miss the nights we spent watching t.v. in bed, with Mona the cat jealously trying to edge me off the bed. I still think about the night we took a blanket to the field to watch the meteor shower. I made a dozen wishes on a dozen shooting stars that night, and I remember every one, which is really quite amazing considering how many beers we had that night. I miss the feeling of safety, security, warmth, and love I fell asleep with every night, laying there next to him. I miss waking up in the middle of the night, and loving it because I got to lay there and stare at him, memorizing everything about him. I miss the scent of him. I even miss his snoring.

I miss the mornings the most. I miss waking up next to him. I miss our morning banter over coffee as we reminisced about the day before and made plans for the day ahead. I miss waking up, and looking at him, and knowing that for that day, we were still together, and I tried not to think ahead to the day I would fly back home, or the days thereafter.

It’s been over a year since I’ve seen him in person, but I see him everyday in my mind, and every night in my dreams. I wish he didn’t haunt me so. I feel his presence when I’m alone in the woods, and hear his laughter in the wind.

No matter how much two people may want the same thing, sometimes love just isn’t enough, and dreams simply don’t come true. They remain what they are… just dreams.

I miss him…my lover…my strength…my best friend… and my birthday wish is for him.

I wish him love. I wish him inner peace. I wish him a lifetime of blessings and happiness.

*and with these wishes, she closes her eyes, and blows out her candles*

Gotta Be Somebody For Me Out There

This time
I wonder what it feels like
To find the one in this life
The one we all dream of
But dreams just aren’t enough
So I’ll be waiting for the real thing
I’ll know it by the feeling
The moment when we’re meeting
Will play out like a scene, straight off the silver screenSo I’ll be holding my breath
Right up to the end
Until that moment when
I’ll find the one that I’ll spend forever with’Cause nobody wants to be the last one there
And everyone wants to feel like someone cares
Someone to love, with my life in their hands
There’s gotta be somebody for me like that
‘Cause nobody wants to go in on their own
And everyone wants to know they’re not alone
Somebody else that feels the same somewhere
There’s gotta be somebody for me out there

Tonight
Out on the street, out in the moonlight
And damn it, this feels too right
It’s just like deja vu, me standing here with you
So I’ll be holding my breath
Could this be the end
Is it that moment when
I find the one that I’ll spend forever with?

‘Cause nobody wants to be the last one there
And everyone wants to feel like someone cares
Someone to love, with my life in their hands
There’s gotta be somebody for me like that
‘Cause nobody wants to go in on their own
And everyone wants to know they’re not alone
Somebody else that feels the same somewhere
There’s gotta be somebody for me out there

Ooh…
You can’t give up
(When you’re lookin’ for)
The diamond in the rough
(Because you never know)
When it shows up
(Make sure you’re holdin’ on)
‘Cause it could be the one
The one you’re waiting on

‘Cause nobody wants to be the last one there
And everyone wants to feel like someone cares
Someone to love, with my life in their hands
There’s gotta be somebody for me…
Ooh…
Nobody wants to go in on their own
And everyone wants to know they’re not alone
Somebody else that feels the same somewhere
There’s gotta be somebody for me out there

Nobody wants to be the last one there
And everyone wants to feel like someone cares
Somebody else that feels the same somewhere
There’s gotta be somebody for me out there

Nickleback

I thought I’d found my “somebody” in Wisconsin…  but time and distance won out.  All the wishes, dreams, and hopes I had are drifting away with the sands of time. I love him still, and I always will.  While I’m certain that if either of us had had the means, we would be together, life (just trying to survive it from day to day) kept that from happening.  He is a wonderful man, and we both deserve “somebody”…. but we both need somebody that isn’t 1,000 miles away, with no way to close the gap.

I can only believe that for ALL of us, “There’s Gotta Be Somebody Out There”…

And for you, my love….take care… be happy…and love with all that you are….

How A Domestic Goddess Breaks Down a Tire

I’m a single mom who recently lost her job, and when I need money, I do what I have to do. This time it meant breaking down tires so I could pocket a quick $9 per rim.

The tools required for the job? The corner of my storage bulding, a floor jack and a hacksaw.

Drag everything to the corner of building. Set tire on jack and hoist it up til the tire is squished between the corner and jack, popping the bead on the tire. Then take the hacksaw, cut through the bead, and tire is removed!

Broken…

The broken clock is a comfort, it helps me sleep tonight
Maybe it can stop tomorrow from stealing all my time
I am here still waiting though i still have my doubts
I am damaged at best, like you’ve already figured out

I’m falling apart, I’m barely breathing
With a broken heart that’s still beating
In the pain there is healing
In your name I find meaning
So I’m holdin’ on, I’m holdin’ on, I’m holdin’ on
I’m barely holdin’ on to you

The broken locks were a warning you got inside my head
I tried my best to be guarded, I’m an open book instead
I still see your reflection inside of my eyes
That are looking for a purpose, they’re still looking for life

I’m falling apart, I’m barely breathing
with a broken heart that’s still beating
In the pain is there healing
In your name I find meaning
So I’m holdin’ on
I’m barely holdin’ on to you

I’m hangin’ on another day
Just to see what you will throw my way
And I’m hanging on to the words you say
You said that I will, I’ll be ok

The broken lights on the freeway left me here alone
I may have lost my way now, haven’t forgotten my way home

I’m falling apart, I’m barely breathing
with a broken heart that’s still beating
In the pain there is healing
In your name I find meaning
So I’m holdin’ on
I’m barely holdin’ on to you

I miss my friend. I miss our talks,  the laughter, and I even miss our fights.  I miss laying beside you on the blanket in the middle of a field while we made a dozen wishes on a dozen shooting stars.  I wish you could send me my heart back from Wisconsin, but I know it will be a slow journey, because it doesn’t want to leave on it’s own.   You will always be my Great North Woodsman. I will always love you, and wish you all the happiness life can bring you.

How To Pick A Wife

The first man married a woman from Mississippi and told her that she was going to do dishes and house cleaning. It took a couple days, but on the third day he came home to a clean house and dishes washed and put away.

The second man married a woman from Oklahoma . He gave his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes and the cooking. The first day he didn’t see any results but the next day he saw it was better. By the third day he saw his house was clean, the dishes were done and there was a huge dinner on the table.

The third man married a girl from Arkansas . He told her that her duties were to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed and hot meals on the table for every meal. He said the first day he didn’t see anything, the second day he didn’t see anything, but by the third day some of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye, enough to fix himself a bite to eat and load the
dishwasher.

Annoying Things To Do On An Elevator

1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask “Got enough air in there?”

2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.

3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you’re embarrassed when they open themselves.

4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.

5) MEOW occasionally.

6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: “You’re one of THEM” – and back away slowly

7) SAY -DING at each floor.

SAY “I wonder what all these do?” And push all the red buttons.

9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: “I have new socks on.”

11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: “Is that your beeper?”

12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.

13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: “This is my personal space.”

14) WHEN there’s only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn’t you.

15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.

16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.

17) HOLD the doors open and say you’re waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say “Hi Greg, How’s your day been?”

18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: “That’s mine!”

19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.

20) PRETEND you’re a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.

21) SWAT at flies that don’t exist.

22) CALL out “Group hug” then enforce it.